I have a problem. Specifically a sock gnome problem. You might have this problem too. See, my apartment is infested with sock gnomes. When I'm not at home, they sneak into my sock drawer and steal my socks. Except they don't like to steal a whole pair. No, that would be too easy. Instead they like to steal one half of a pair. Leaving me with dozens of partnerless socks.
It's a sad state of affairs, and I've tried everything I could to rid my house of this sock gnome infestation, but they're just too hardy and wily! So instead, I've resigned myself to the sock gnomes and have come up with various things to do with my orphan socks.
1) Wear them. If I'm wearing tall boots, or ankle boots with jeans, my socks aren't noticeable. So I just wear mismatched socks.
2) Use them to dust. I used to love these disposable feather dusters, but they're not so environmentally friendly. So instead, I pull a sock over my hand, dust, and then throw the sock in the washing machine.
3) Use them to make rice-socks to keep me warm at night.
4) Use them as a carrying case for an ipod. (Pick a cute mismatched sock for this one.)
5) Use them to make sock puppets. Okay, I don't do this. But I hear Phoebe Buffay does!
6) Use them instead of paper towels. Since I don't use paper towels, I desperately need more kitchen cloths, but since I can't buy new stuff, I've been using socks at times to clean up spills.
7) Use them to hold change. I have a cup for this, but when I want to take the change to Coinstar, I used to put the coins in a Ziploc bag. But since I am now reusing my Ziplocs, and don't want that grime on a sandwich bag, I put the change in a sock.
8) I haven't done this, but I could send extra orphan socks to One Small Step.
9) Use them to smack other people when they annoy me. :)
10) Keep em in the sock drawer in the vain hope that one day the sock gnomes will return my socks.
Cindy W, thanks for inspiring me to write this post!
1 month ago