This morning, I was walking to work doing my daily "I hate this challenge, I hate this challenge, I hate this challenge," affirmations, when I realized that I was being a little unfair. I do not hate this challenge per se. In fact, there are certain aspects of it (like reading on the Metro) which are quite nice.
So my anger is probably a little displaced. I don't hate monthly challenges. Or public transit. Or saving money on gasoline. Or the Earth. Or Al Gore. In fact, I think I just hate exercise.
I know, I know, exercise is so goooooooood for me. I should be HAPPY that you know, my heart is probably doing better, and like, my legs are getting stronger, and that walking two miles no longer makes me want to die.
Yeah, well you know what? All that might be true, but there is no denying that exercise SUCKS. It is tiring, and painful and ohmygod I haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate it so much! Why can't I just drive my stupid car like everyone else and then come home and sit on the couch and eat bonbons? And then I have to wake up EARLY so I can WALK some more, and I LOVE SLEEP. I LOVE SLEEP MORE THAN ALMOST ANYTHING ELSE.
So I hope you're happy, stupid Earth. Just for you, I am walking when I could be sleeping. JUST FOR YOU. Don't let anyone tell you that I am getting ANY BENEFIT WHATSOEVER OUT OF THIS. Cuz I am totally totally not! You hear me, Earth!?! Hello?!!
1 week ago