Friday, February 29, 2008

Darn You To Heck, Crunchy Chicken!!!

I have eaten foods involving bacon for three meals straight. Lunch? Also involves bacon? Dinner? If you guessed, bacon, it's what's for dinner you would be correct.

See, once upon a time I threw a party and Honda brought bacon as part of a bacon-wrapped dates appetizer. Except that she bought too much bacon so after the party was over there was a whole packet of bacon leftover. Which Honda left in my fridge.

Where it stayed.

For days. And weeks. And weeks.

And finally the other day I looked in my fridge and realized that my bacon was about to expire!!

"Oh no!" I cried. "Crunchy Chicken will flay/filet me if she finds out I threw away an ENTIRE packet of bacon!"

And so it was that I set into the kitchen and started making use of the bacon. And then I did eat said bacon.

And the first bacon dish was delicious.

And the second bacon dish was too.

But by the third bacon dish, I wondered if I could *hear* my arteries clogging up.

So I packed up my turkey bacon chili and started to hand servings out willy nilly to any and all takers.

The moral of the story is: don't wait until the day before your food expires to cook it.

The end.

5 comments:

Chile said...

Arduous! Have you not got a freezer?! Freeze the damn stuff next time, cooked or not cooked. Back in my carnivorous days, I'd cut a package of bacon up into 4 parts (short strips) and freeze them separately. No need to pig out that way. ;-P

EcoGeoFemme said...

At least bacon is sooo yummy. I don't eat much meat, but I'm a sucker for bacon. good thing I don't encounter it very often.

arduous said...

Chile, what can I say? Sometimes I am lacking in common sense. It didn't occur to me until I was in the middle of cooking that I could have just frozen the bacon. :\

Crunchy Chicken said...

I second Chile's freezer suggestion. I think that perhaps, deep down, you just actually wanted all that bacon.

Should I send you my RoadRunner showerhead to flay you on my behalf?

arduous said...

Ha, ha, well Crunchy, I do have a low flow showerhead, but I guess after losing all sense like that, I probably do deserve it! ;)