It never fails to shock me that the world keeps spinning on its axis, even in the face of tragedy. I remember that the morning after my dad died, I was vaguely surprised to see the newspaper so full of ordinary, mundane news, when clearly the world would never be the same again. And yesterday I couldn't believe how much news there was on the election, yes the same election I've been obsessed with for months.
But I don't care about the election right now. I only care about my friend. And I want to be able to Google her name and get her current status, instead of you know, her Linked In profile. I keep obsessively checking her blog. Why? I couldn't tell you.
I think this might be the slight advantage to public tragedy. In a public tragedy, everyone mourns with you, and you can watch CNN for updates. Of course the downside is that you get politicians trying to out-do each other in their empathy for you, and CNN is really only reporting your tragedy because tragedy brings higher ratings.
Anyway, I'm still in LA for various reasons and I feel totally helpless. Of course as a friend pointed out, I wouldn't be any less helpless were I out there. And it sucks. It sucks to sit and wait and to not be able to do anything. This is the advantage of being religious, and I'm not a big fan of organized religion, but prayer is definitely something to *do.* A way to feel less impotent.
Sorry for the bleak nature of this post, but this is really all I can think about right now.
1 year ago
4 comments:
Hang in there, Arduous. I'll be thinking of you and wishing the best for your friend.
It must be hard to be far from your network during a bad time. Even if you can't do anything, it's good to be together to support one another.
We're here to listen while you are not near them, and any other time.
Came over here from Mad Hatter and EcoGeoFemme....interesting that they are the other two commenters...anyway, I wanted to wish you luck and support during this difficult time.
I'm so sorry. My thoughts are with you and your friend, and I hope you can get out there to see her soon.
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